All-One

20 years ago I moved to Australia. I had just graduated university and was devastated by a break up with my first love.  I had $500 to my name and a one year work visa. I didn’t know where I was going in Australia nor did I know anyone there.  The only thing I knew was I needed to learn how to be alone.  

My devastation was not because of the break up.  It was because I realized I had a belief that another person was what would make me feel whole.  I now could see my only path to wholeness was between myself and god.  I went as far away as possible to burn the bridges of comfort of what’s known.  

I departed on the second day of flights leaving New York City after 9/11.   As I flew away from JFK, I watched the twin towers smoking and smoldering beneath me.  I was taking a big leap of faith.  It was a time of great fear and unpredictability.  I had no idea what was about to happen in America as I flew far away leaving my family and friends behind.

Within the first three days of landing in Sydney,  my money was almost gone. I had been visiting different sections of the city to see where I wanted to live.  Nothing felt right.  I became incredibly discouraged. My fear was starting to ramp up. I knew I had to make decision, and fast. I also knew that I was not in a good state to make a decision. At the time, the loudest voice in my head was in a panic.  Beneath that storm was a steady whisper, “Stop pushing. Slow down.”  I finally heeded that call and took a 1/2 hour ferry ride out of the city to Manly Beach. 

As soon as I got there, I knew I found my place.  I sat on the beach letting the ocean work it’s magic.  When I was calm and grounded, I walked into two different restaurants to ask for a job. I was hired on the spot. I decided to take the one who offered me a position as one of two head chefs. I began the next day.

Each one of us has moments in our lives when we can choose to collapse in fear or courageously pivot into the unknown.  It can be incredibly challenging when we are in high stress situations and our emotional responses are impacting our ability to sense the next step clearly.  Stepping away from a time sensitive, high pressure situation can seem counterintuitive.  Yet, giving yourself the gift of pause, centering, and deep listening are the exact remedy.  There is an answer to every problem when you let yourself be guided.  

The first step is letting yourself slow down and get quiet enough to listen.  The second step is to actually be receptive to hearing what the guidance is.  Sometimes this is the hardest part because the answer will often be an uncomfortable action inviting you to grow.  

This is the human experience.  You get to choose to make each moment an opportunity to be the best version of yourself.  When you mess up or do not meet your expectations, okay.  Keep going, steady yourself, and know that the next step is always available to you. 

These are wild times, similar to post 9/11 in some ways.  We have a great opportunity as individuals, and a collective, to reorganize on the deepest levels.  Where can you pivot and use the challenges you have experienced to work for you rather than against you? 

Dare to Desire!
Kristen